No, you're not the first to fall apart

So I've been so busy posting eye candy blogs haha... that I've slacked off on my "30 days of truth" blogs... so time to play catch up!

Day 2: Something you love about yourself.

Well lets see... they don't really specify whether or not it's something physical, or emotional, or personality, or whatever... so I'll just pick some stuff I guess...

It's hard for me to have a lot of confidence in my appearance when I let myself get so far gone from what I used to look like... but I've made lots of progress... 54 lbs lost.... kind of stagnating now in the weight loss because I never have a babysitter to watch the boys while I work out... and by the time the boys are asleep I'm too tired to put on a workout dvd at home... but I haven't given up, I'm not gaining anything back, and I do intend on losing another 50 lbs.

But men for the most part have told me that I have beautiful eyes, or a beautiful smile. And I guess I can see how some would think that? But probably its the boobies they really like... LOL. But I'm constantly trying to improve on both my inner and outer beauty... and I have to love that about myself... that I don't give up on myself and just let myself go... when sometimes that would be all to easy under the circumstances...

I love that I'm not a selfish person. I see so much selfishness in others... and it's sad. My ultimate goal in life is to be the best mom to my kids, best partner and lover to my future... (boyfriend?)... and best friend to all my friends that I can be. My happiness comes from making other people happy... and like my therapist says, thats a good quality to have, as long as people respect it, and don't abuse it, and don't make me a doormat.

I love that despite all that has gone wrong in my life... I still manage to keep a somewhat postitive outlook for the future... and I push on... and keep trying to make my life better. I have my dark days... everyone does... and I actually have a prescription for an antidepressent that I've yet to fill... but that I am considering trying out if my mood doesn't improve even more on its own.... because I want to be my old self again. And not let the drama that men can bring into your life, bring me down!